So, as I said, I went speed dating last night through Hurry Date ™. After much nervousness on my part, I’m happy to report that it was really fun, and not at all the disembowling trainwreck that I had feared. Well, no trainwreck yet, anyway. As you’ll see, the results are frustratingly in limbo until tonight. Per Mike’s request (and to convince the rest of your singletons to give it a try), here’s a rundown of my night (after the jump), complete with a running score.

6:15pm - I leave work, after spending the previous half hour in the bathroom washing my face, brushing my teeth, and trying not to look too prissy in front of the maintenance guys who just have to pee, and can’t be bothered by me. [+1 pretty]
6:30pm - I arrive at the Abbey, entirely too early. I go to Nikki’s place, because I’m nervous and I have to do something. No one’s home, so I take the opportunity to swallow an entire package of mints for dinner. [+10 breath, -3 stomach ache]
7:00pm - I return to the Abbey. There’s no Hurry Date ™ sign anywhere, so I wander around like an idiot until I seek sanctuary in the restroom. Luckily, upon emerging, I see two other lost-looking guys (who turn out to be Neil and Kevin, I’ll learn later), and follow them into the back third-bar room. [+1 map]
7:10pm - I’m checked in by my lesbian door host, who was awesome but who’s name I promptly forgot. I remind myself not to space out when people tell me their names. [+1 nametag]
7:12pm - I call Nikki, because being alone in a bar is not fun. And I’m nervous. She tells me to drink, so I head to the bar. While waiting for my drink I meet two more guys from Hurry Date ™ (James and not-James, who’s name I promptly forget. I remind myself not to space out when people tell me their names.) They are thankfully are not insane, and they’ve done this before, and they gather a small group of people, so I don’t have to deal with finding other people to talk to. [+2 armor, +1 booze]
7:30pm - With the activities about to start, I get another drink. [+1 booze]
7:35pm - They split us up by the color of our name tags. I’m a blue, so I get to choose a seat. I choose poorly - a too-deep couch that tries to eat me. Paolo, a red, joins me, and I’m excited to learn that I’m the one that gets to rotate. Sorry Paolo. [+1 mobility]
7:40pm - Paolo and I do our 4-minute date. He’s way more nervous than I am, and we waste 30 seconds having me write his number on his nametag, since he forgot. [+1 confidence]
7:44pm - On the first rotation, everyone realizes that at least part of that 4 minutes is necessary for administration. Luckily, since I’m rotating, I can move first, then write notes out of Paolo’s sight. We’re also supposed to circle a yes or no right away, but I’m not sure about Paolo, so I defer. I quickly learn this is a bad idea. [+1 secrecy, -1 intelligence]
7:48pm - I rotate around the whole room with the rest of the blues. Only once do I run out of things to say to someone, Boring Guy, who wanted to spend too much time talking about how we didn’t know each other or have anything to say to each other. I, on the other hand, am remarkably adept at playing the game. The secret is to just talk about anything (even the event), but not to let on that you have no idea what to say. If you can do that initially, something worthwhile usually comes up. In the back of my mind, I wonder if this is how other people talk to strangers… [+2 intelligence]
7:52pm - I meet Neil, who works for LPI, but is technophobic. I’m totally having fun! The comfort level of having common goals and knowing that you’ll be rid of anyone in 4 minutes changes the dynamic, and I find that I’m often taking the conversational lead. It could also be the booze.
8:10pm - We have an odd number, so I’m on a Date Break ™. I go to the bathroom, and then chat with the host. I need another drink, but there’s not enough time, so… [-5 pee]
8:15pm - James and I take our date to the bar, so we can get more to drink. [+1 booze]
8:47pm - We finish our red vs. blue rotation, so now the colors rotate amongst themselves. I meet Kevin, who reads the Economist, Steve, who used to work for CBS, Will, who I had early-on decided was cute, and Chad, who’s already been dubbed “the eBay guy” by the crowd. Not-James flirts with me a lot, and tries to get me to sleep with him. Later, he tries to molest me, and I almost knock over a bus boy in my escape. [+4 people, +1 sex, -5 propriety]
10:15pm - We’re done, and most of us are just milling about, not sure of what to do. I miss one guy becuase of the odd number, who looks very WeHo (and is now Unknown WeHo Guy), and ends up leaving with Boring Guy. I’m puzzled by that, but, as John pointed out, it seems appropriate for the one I didn’t meet and the one I didn’t want to leave together. I escape to the bathroom again, and then head home. I’m too drunk to deal with entering my scores, and I decide to sleep on it anyway, so I just pass out. [+2 (for everyone!) unwanted guys out of the way, -3 pee, +10 sleep]

This morning, I entered my scores online. I agonized over a few, but ultimately eliminated people who a) were hot but boring or b) were interesting but not attractive or age-inappropriate. I came looking for a relationship, not sex or friends, I reasoned. I’m also nervous about leading someone on if I just wanted to be friends. I also don’t check the “prevent my ‘no’s’ from contacting me” box, to allow those friends to maybe get through. This leaves me “yes”ing 4 out of 19 guys. That seems low, but I actually would go out on dates with those 4. If that happens, it’d be way more dating than normal, so that’s not too bad, I figure. For the record, I “yes”ed Kevin, Steve, Will, and Chad, all of whom were blues, who I didn’t meet until the second half. I question my vodka goggles, but click onward. Hurry Date ™ threatens that I can’t change my scores, but I click onward, hoping for some immediate gratification and a presentation of my Adoring Matches.

What’s this? “24 hours after the party your matches will be ready for viewing on HurryDate.com.” Noooo! All of this “Cut to the Chase” (which is an awesome slogan, btw), and now I have to wait? Grr. I suppose it’s to give the guys time to enter their scores, but damn if I wasn’t firing up my calendar and ready to schedule some dates. Further reporting as Matches roll in and Dates (hopefully) unfold.

Even if nothing comes of any of these dates, I would do it again, because I can definitely see the potential. In fact, if I’m still single by the end of February, I might try the Santa Monica one, which should draw a different crowd, and would fall squarely outside of my no-date window (aka The Curse, which has caused me to not date successfully between Halloween and Valentine’s Day for years). And it was fun! Being forced to talk to strangers was a good thing, and hopefully will help me not be such a freak about it in other situations.

Just to be clear: if you’re single, I think you ought to try it, no matter how scary it sounds. I offer my protection on future Hurry Date ™ missions, should any of you want to try it.